Oh! Canada!

On July 1st, Canada will commence to mandate marijuana for official unadulterated legalization, ending the way overdue prohibition of the mighty weed.  And here’s a fun fact that you have to be blazing high to believe it, but this is only the second nation in the world to come to their senses to make it legal for distribution, the other being Uruguay which legalized it 4 years ago.

Canada’s full on legalization doesn’t start until October so they can suss out the logistics to make it ready for law enforcement and businesses to naturalize the process. But being that every pot smoking citizen will no longer feel paranoid about lighting up in the nation, things are going to be fine like the kind. Also the fact that Canada will be first in line for data research from all fields regarding marijuana. But what they’ll mostly benefit from the weed is surely from medicinal uses, which is noted for fighting glaucoma and the deleterious effects from cancer and has recently been discovered as a deterrent to stave off effects of CTE disorder.

This means that whatever budgetary largesse Canada is going to lose with Stronghead Trump’s senseless tariffs to our neighbor above us, the Great White And Greener North will surely make up for it with the legitimate business sales and taxes that will be accrued from tons and tons of Mary Jane. While this country and the stubborn burnt out elected hacks in DC will continue to lag behind being swallowed by trillions of dollars in debt and with millions of people capable of working and paying taxes imprisoned because of this ass backwards century old prohibition of pot.

While in New York City, which is supposedly so fucking vibrant and diverse for disgusting craft beer and lousy expensive bourbon but not for smoking joints and blunts, Mayor de Blasio decided to order his NYPD to lay off tokers with a rather paltry and lame stab at decriminalizing possession and the public smoking of pot. Being that this was decided after it was found that the majority of arrests for Blacks and Hispanics were overly outnumbered by the amount of emergency complaints that were called in by people offended by the sweet sticky aromas of smoke exhalation.

It turns out that this half-measured wink-and-nudge command by the ethically bereft and defiantly hypocritical mayor makes a lot of exceptions for who gets a summons, which is a pain in the ass by itself because you still have to waste a day to go to court and who gets cuffed.

So according to these six exceptions, the disparity stops will not cease. These arbitrary regulations are redundant being that if pot is decriminalized then it even should apply to these smokers too. With the exception of driving while stoned and lacking I.D., two of the rules are plainly openended (“the categorizing by and the purported legitimate law enforcement exception”), for Blacks and Hispanics will still be stopped for smoking weed because of these prevaricated suspicions of which will be enhanced thanks to the hazy presence of buddah in the air. It’s highly likely that citizens of the middle eastern and South Asian persuasions will be stopped too.

As White folks, especially those hip White folks, will continue to smoke weed with glorious impunity being that they are the number one consumers of pot in this city and the lowest of the races charged. Which will give those fortunate sons and daughters with access to that pot speakeasy in Greenpoint* more reason to celebrate in their stoner crapulence and apathy.

Canada’s full on legalization doesn’t start until October so they can suss out the logistics to make it ready for law enforcement and businesses to naturalize the process. But being that every pot smoking citizen will no longer feel paranoid about lighting up in the nation, things are going to be fine like the kind when the autumn solstice comes around. Also the fact that Canada will be first in line for data research from all fields regarding marijuana.

As for what the city, particularly for those upholding and enforcing the law and Mayor Big Slow continuing to waffle, it’s going to get more expensive for everyone who are determined who shouldn’t be toking and to taxpayers who prefer not to get high with unnecessary police deployments, court hearings and of course jail time for a joint or a baggie. Another ramification will be the continuing rise of the usage and the market of K-2 for those who can’t afford the quality buds or the lack of availability of them from busted sellers because this state is still lollygagging on the issue. Even though 9 other states have already legalized it and Colorado has seen billions of revenue in the past few years since it’s legalization. The only shot to end this arcane prohibition is if Mario’s son Governor Cuomo will legalize weed when he needs another desperate shot to resuscitate his re-election campaign.

Come October, it will already be too late for New York and even this country. Canada has already got a massive jump with their decision. Besides, Toronto is basically a nicer version of Manhattan, the air is cleaner up there and the stars are more visible, which is way cool to see while high. And this grounds of the city will continue to deteriorate amiss the luxury tower pestilence blocking the sun and sky.

If New York doesn’t legalize soon, there might be a stoner and consumer dollar exodus heading for the Great White North.

So lay off smokers de Faustio and legalize it already Andrew, you fucking hosers!

*this is not a promotion or shout out to the club, I think to commensurate with and reparations for the amount of people who got arrested for possessing and selling on the streets in the last few years since possession was decriminalized, this club should be raided and it’s proprietors and customers should get the same justice meted to them as have those victimized already by this unfair system